In the blink of an eye...

I seriously can just stand at her door and watch her sleep.

She is so amazingly perfect.
Every inch of her.
Sometimes I am actually overwhelmed by how strongly I feel for this little being...

Tomorrow is Makylie's 4th birthday.
How did that happen? I feel like it was just yesterday that I found I was pregnant with her.
It is an age-old story of time...that for mom's, it will always feel, I think, like it was just yesterday.

(I was huge...this is the night my water broke...I look like I am carrying triplets. When I started pushing, the on-call Doctor called for help because, not being my actual Dr and doing all of the scans etc, she thought that the baby was going to be too big for my body...turns out it was just the way she was sitting, because she was only 7 pounds.)

4 years ago, almost to the minute, my water broke. 4 years ago, tomorrow night, I stared down at this amazingly beautiful baby, that graced us with the chance to love her. This little being that took a full day to labor, and only two pushes to get out. My mind swirled with the promise that this life held, the things she would accomplish, the opportunities she would have.


All the while, I was literally, caught up in the sheer miracle that this process is.



Being the youngest, she has remained the baby. She is smaller then most girls her age, she has not overcome her speech impetiments so she talks much like a toddler talks, she refers to herself as "the littlest one"...she is just, still our baby.

I try to wrap my mind around time. I struggle to remember every single detail, and I want to tuck it in my pocket and hold on. I adore the way she is right at EVERY single minute! Today, tomorrow, Yesterday...all of them, exactly where she was meant to be at that time. I, want it all.

I spend my days just trying to soak her in. All of her.
I still smell her all of the time, and I stare at her while she sleeps, and sometimes, for no reason, I pick her up in the middle of the night so that she will lay on my shoulder like she did not so very long ago.

She is so kind-hearted, and loving. She is quite and shy, yet as is usually the case for younger siblings, she also definately knows how to stand up for herself.

She tells Tyler all of the time that he is her best friend, and says things like..."'cause, I just love you" to him. She makes us all smile...
She makes me feel important and heroic, and I can truly say, that I am a better person as her mommy.


Happy Birthday baby girl.